Peace and greetings to our Lake Love friends.
We’ve taken a little break from posting images and stories, other than a few smaller shoots here and there; it is altogether strange, sad, and warming to know that I feel the need to share why we haven’t been sharing our creativity with others as often as in previous Lake Love years- it is also a bit assumptive of me to think that people are wondering why we aren’t posting. When I was little, ‘posting’ was a verb that hadn’t even entered my self-judgment category of vocabulary, but here we are. The pressure to perform is one that is felt so often in a world of creating for others, whether that be photography or teaching, or any other work that requires creative energies, and what-do-ya-know…we do both! BUT a lot of this pressure is self-created. Despite its potential to drive results, it can be draining, and so we decided to put more focus at the start of 2019 on what matters most to us- ‘JUST US’- and…our new space which happens to be a pretty, darn, cool reflection of the work we’ve been putting in to a direction we both needed.
In our first year of marriage, we chose to take on quite a bit of change: new town, new job, new apartment (moved twice in the last year), new layer to our relationship. It has been one of our most rewarding and challenging years yet. (And to those of you who are new parents, or have been married for 40 years, or have 20 grandchildren, we imagine there are many more obstacles ahead to face and many more moments of joy to be had- more transitions to come.)
With a shift in perspective, which at times can be incredibly challenging, transition can be such a beautiful, heart-opening experience, and I’ve found it difficult this year to accurately express this to those in my personal circle. I’ve found myself thinking, “Maybe it doesn’t have to be shared. Maybe they just ‘get it’.” Literature and art always seem to say it best for me, so when I came across a recent post that captured what was on my heart, I decided it needed to be shared. And goodness, I’m so grateful that Sheleana Aiyana, the Founder of @risingwoman decided to share this (https://www.instagram.com/risingwoman/?hl=en), . Sheleana is a writer of conscious relationships, and I always feel a bit lighter after reading her wise words:
“Relationships offer us a container to level up our love game. To nurture our inner-child, to give and receive love in a healthy way, to develop clear boundaries and self-care rituals. Relationships get easier when we loosen our grip, and begin to see them as a human being with their own path, choices, desires and beliefs. A relationship is like a plant that needs water to survive. It never stops needing water just because it’s rooted firmly in its place, it is a living thing, and so is a relationship.”
If you’re working on your relationship- with yourself, with your friends, with your family, with your partner…then I’m flippin’ proud of you. It is NOT selfish. It is NORMAL. It is IMPORTANT. It is BEAUTIFUL, and I admire you for it. Challenge your perspective on what this work looks like. Tune in to your inner-child. If you don’t know this voice in yourself, time to start searching. The answers are usually waiting there for you, and you might need a mentor or therapist to guide this out. Shaming options that you have not personally tried can be a wonderful signal to your heart. We should also congratulate people for continuing this work through all phases of life.
So, go ahead…I invite you to metaphorically, or literally, ‘buy a new plant, and water the heck out of it’ (well don’t overwater it), but at least go to that gardening store you’ve always wanted to check out. Here are some little gems, (or ‘momes’ in the words of Jonathan Van Ness), from our new home that I decided to capture on camera after feeling inspired by this @risingwoman reminder:
“Relationships are hard because our partners are our mirrors, showing us our own edges and inviting us to go deeper. And relationships are hard because you have to consciously choose YES to growth, even on the days when saying yes isn’t easy.”
And, YES we named all of our plants- there goes that little judgy voice creeping in again right before I ‘post’ this. Ignore the haters in your head, people! Check out this plant yearbook below in no particular order of passion…a potential waste of time, I think not:
Top Row: ‘My girl, Ivy’, 'Aegon’ & ‘Elton’, ‘My girl, Ivy’ again, ‘Christine’, wrapped by ‘Persephone’
Middle Row: Oops, ‘My Girl, Ivy’ again! Not sorry- she’s so pretty!!, ‘Ginny Weasley’, ‘Bella Palm’, & ‘Severus’ (not featured is twin plant ‘Snape’)
Bottom Row: ‘The Dothraki Twins’ and ‘Vera’, ‘Ernie’, ‘Jean Iverson’, & ‘Ophelia’
We dreamt of ‘walls and walls of plants to water and books to read’ as we stated in our vows. Here we are. I couldn’t be more excited to water them- to water this.
Cheers and a happy Spring and Summer to friends who are putting in that work and bringing light to everyone around them. Hoping joy and compassion are your new normal just as they strive to be ours.
Lake Love, Jen
